Saturday 31 December 2011

Pocket Plentiful

With the cold weather upon us we've had to crack out our winter gear.  This means Brandon's big poofy winter jacket has also made its debut this year.  I admit, the jacket I'm sure is very warm.  It better be for how big and poofy it is!  But let me tell you about another feature this jacket has... it has a TONNE of pockets!  I mean, this thing has so many pockets!  Everywhere.  On the sides.  On the arms.  Inside.  Outside.  Hidden ones too.  Even pockets inside of other pockets!

While I see the benefit of having some pockets, is it necessary to have the 10 some odd pockets that exist on this jacket?!  He would tell you they are all useful, but I can attest to the fact that he most definitely does not use them all.

Friday 30 December 2011

Dog Ettiquette

I've had dogs all my life.  I've raised many puppies, participated in conformation dogs shows, agility and obedience.  So, yes, I'd call myself experienced.  Which is why I feel I can comment on all the stupid dog owners out there!

http://www.motifake.com/tags/responsibility
Responsibility
Dogs are a commitment.  For at minimum 8 years, but as Brandon's family knows it can go well into the teen years if you've got a robust dog.  People want to buy puppies, and forget that those puppies grow up into sometimes very large dogs which require a lot of time, attention, money and exercise.  The  people that don't think ahead annoy me.  Dogs don't get a voice, so its incredibly unfair to abuse your power as a human being to just take what you want and get rid of it when you don't.  An example of this is, someone who left a perfectly lovely Bichon Frise at a pet store a few weeks ago.  Brought the dog in for grooming and then just left it, never came back for it.  How confused and terrified do you think that poor dog was?  The pet store no longer sells dogs, so it's not like they could just turn around and sell it to someone.  And seriously- did these cowardly people really just leave the dog there so they didn't have to face the humane society?  So they didn't have to explain the situation?  Perhaps it could have been a valid reason, and maybe even what was best for the dog.  But you need to take ownership and responsibility for your actions.  Own up to your actions and decisions and face the music.

Behaviour
puppy-training-at-home.com
Dogs need discipline.  It doesn't matter how big or small they are.  They all need it.  Just like kids, dogs actually crave discipline.  It gives them clear boundaries and a better understanding of what is expected of them.  Living in an apartment building which allows dogs, (do you know how hard that is to find?) I see so many ill behaved dogs.  I'm not saying our dogs are perfect, but they know when they've done something wrong and they are disciplined for it.  The people in this place seem to all have a theme of just allowing their dogs to do whatever they please.  Our dogs don't like other dogs, so we take the necessary precautions to ensure we don't bring our dogs around other dogs when they are outdoors and we don't disrupt other people's time with their dogs.  However, I can't tell you how many times we've had people approach us (as our dogs are barking at their dogs).  They can clearly see we are trying to calm down our dogs and discipline them, yet they think bringing their dogs (the problem) closer will somehow calm our dogs down...?
The first situation that infuriates me, is a man who has 5 very well behaved medium-large "bull-type" dogs (Rottweilers, pit bulls, boxers).  He can take these dogs out all together and they walk nicely beside one another and he's got great control.  And I'm very happy for him (and proud that he's not ruining these breeds' reputations further than already has been done by the thousands of others).  However, when I have my 2 large dogs (a combined weight of 200lbs) that are clearly barking AT your dogs and wanting to essentially tear them from ear to ear... why, oh why do you continue to walk right at me?  I'm not asking you to go out of your way.  But when I try to leave the situation- and handle my dogs, don't follow me!  This man and I had a lovely dance around a set of trees for nearly 5 minutes because he thought it would be good for me and my dogs to just approach his dogs to "teach them a lesson".  NO!
Brandon also had a situation lately with stupid dog owners.  A woman was running her two small dogs (off leash) just above our parking lot- already not a wise decision.  Brandon took Sarah out and noticed these dogs and avoided their area.  But, the smart woman who was sadly in charge of these dogs not only allowed them to excessively bark at Sarah but also run up to her, bite on her tail and circle around her.  All the while, she is calmly calling for her (unresponsive) dogs to return to her.  Yet, not making any movements to collect them.  Brandon picked Sarah up and told them woman to come get her dogs.  It turned into more of a situation when the woman continued to make no attempts to get her dogs away from Sarah- who was definitely NOT impressed with their presence.  That situation nearly ended in a fist fight between Brandon and the woman's boyfriend.  But why can't people just take care of their dogs?!      

www.cesarsway.com
On the note of dogs and their behaviour, I love Cesar Millan!  The Dog Whisperer is fantastic!  His methods work and he's so realistic with the people and their dogs.  I'd love to BE The Dog Whisperer... but since that clearly won't happen, if anyone knows him and could arrange for me to meet him somehow that would be my celebrity meet up of choice!


         Finally, just for fun- I saw this adorable dictator-inspired kitten on Conan O'Brien's show for being denied a home in Europe because of his...unfortunate markings...  I'll bring you home little Hitler Kitty!  But maybe you'd have better luck if you'd just put that paw down!

My HGTV profile picture

When I changed my profile picture on my blog, Brandon was first to comment.  Our conversation went something like this,

Brandon: I like your new HGTV profile picture you added to your blog
Me: ummm...what?
Brandon: you used your outdoorsy head shot with your boho hat
Me: haha I like that picture
Brandon: ya-it's just...HGTV inspired

hgtv.ca

Hooray for my HGTV profile picture!  Though I don't agree at all...I do love HGTV so I'll take it as a compliment.  Whether or not it was meant to be one no longer matters to me.

Thursday 29 December 2011

Na-na-na-na-na-na...Batman!

Tonight while I was outside with my pups, playing in the snow and trying to hurry their bathroom break so I could stop the mother nature abuse I was enduring, I looked up into the windows of the apartment building and something...or someone, caught my eye.

BATMAN!
OK, so it probably wasn't the real Batman but it sure did look like him.  At first I thought it was a dog, 'cause I saw the pointy ears and naturally made that assumption that some canine friend was peering out the window.  But as I continued to (rudely) stare at the window I saw this "dog" scratching his head with his hand.  Now, I'm not sure about you, but last time I checked dogs don't have arms and hands.  So my only next logical assumption was, "this must be Batman living above us!"  

Personally, I already feel safer living here.  I mean, with Batman living not only in your building, but a floor above you, how could you not?!

Today I Learned...

... that I have similar qualities to Sally, from the live action movie Cat in the Hat.

We meet Sally at the beginning of the movie, using her PDA to make her to-do list: 

"Today's to-do list.
Number one:
Make to-do list.

Number two:
Practice colouring.

Number three: 
Research graduate schools.

Number four:
Be spontaneous.

Number five:
Create lasting childhood memories.
 
And number six: Amend will."

Watching her brother tear apart the kitchen...

"What is he doing?"

[SIGH]

Number ten:
Make tomorrow's to-do list.

After watching her brother compose a contraption to go sliding down the stairs she says,
"Do you know how hard it's getting to tell people that we're related?"

This sounded all too familiar to Brandon and I.  Just as I was about to say that I admired this young girl for her organization and dedication Brandon pipes in with, "She's you!"  Is it wrong that his comment made me smile?

Either way- I'm thinking of doing my hair like hers.  She's pretty cute, maybe I can achieve that cuteness too?

Wednesday 28 December 2011

I Love When He Talks To My Dog


 This is Hudson:




















He's my 2 year old Bernese Mountain Dog and he's fantastic!  OK so sometimes he does stupid things like, eating socks and tea towels.  But overall, he's great!

He's my baby right now. Since I don't have a real human baby, he's my baby. Brandon doesn't love Hudson like I do. Which I suppose is fine. He treats him nicely and takes care of him so it's good. But when Brandon is in an extra good mood he gets lovey and nice with Hudson. The baby talk and nice things he says all make me gush. I've since told him this and I believe sometimes he does it just so I get all mushy.

There are days he will tell Hudson how wonderful he is and how he loves him and I start to tear up. Like actual tears. It's definitely an off shoot of my dead daddy issues and my desire to see a father type figure with anything I love. ie my dog!

I love when he talks to my dog!

The After-Christmas Time

Brandon and I were very lucky this Christmas.  Lots of family and gifts and, of course, great food.  Some of the lovely gifts of note are: a mini cupcake maker, a surround sound system, a spice rack with accompanying spices, Under Armour workout clothes, an iPhone/iPod alarm clock docking station, homemade molasses horse treats, model airplanes, locking castors for our bed, XBox accessories, perfume, rawhide bones, a Pepe stuffie, Grey's Anatomy Season 7 DVD set, calendars, clothes, a salad spinner... among many other things.  (can you tell who's gifts belong to who?)

In this posting I'd like to discuss my mini cupcake maker, locking castors and my Grey's Anatomy DVD set (assuming you guessed correctly that these gifts were mine).  I hope you guessed that the rawhide and molasses treats belong to our dogs and my horse.   

My mini cupcake maker is adorable-pink even!

I can't wait to begin using it.  Little tiny cupcakes with less mess, less time in so much cuter of a baking facility!  There is also a mini cake ball maker- it makes, well, cake balls.  I think it's baby blue- still cute enough.  I know it's cheating- not "real" baking I guess.  But so convenient for quick and easy cupcakes.  I also got a cake decorating set- so I'll be ready to decorate these adorable cupcakes once they're ready.  I'll be sure to take lots of pictures to show you how wonderful (or terrible) my decorating skills are.


The locking castors are an interesting story.  Our plastic, rolling castors are on a hardwood floor, so anytime we sit, lay down or breathe our bed moves.  Instead of my family understanding this, my grandmother...yes, my GRANDMOTHER, decides to announce in front of the rest of my family and friends, "they're for when you two get rowdy in your bed!".  I'm sorry-what?!  No, not what they're for!  (I mean, yes ok that will be helpful too- but not what we need them for!)  I'll have you all know, these castors that have locks are installed and are better than previous said castors.

I was very excited to open my Grey's Anatomy DVD set.  I had just rented the first two discs and now I owned it.  This completed my set- I already have seasons 1 through 6.  I will, of course, get all subsequent seasons also.  So I have begun watching all the episodes (again) and loving them.  I'm very much looking forward to the musical event episode.  So during my watching of episodes-between Brandon's grumblings of how stupid he thinks the show is- I notice something of interest.  Calle Torres and Mark Sloan (characters of the show) are showering in the morning chatting about their (not-so) recent breakups.  But that's not what makes this scene interesting to me, it's the toothbrush in Calle's mouth...in the shower.  She brushes her teeth in the shower too!  See?  It's not so strange.  Brandon seems to think this concretes his beliefs that the show is stupid and that my brushing my teeth in the shower is abnormal.  Whatever.   He's wrong. 

The Christmas tree is down, the decorations have been boxed.  We did this upon arriving back home on Christmas Day.  I'm not one to rush the holidays away, but we had put up our Christmas tree so early (recall Whobalation) that I knew it had to come down soon-ish and I didn't want to have to wake up and face the looming work each day.  So I tackled it that night-as exhausted as I was.  So, Whobalation is over.  For this year.  Our living area has returned to normal setup which also makes the room seem much larger (however NOT in actuality larger).  It's kind of nice to have normal back.

And tonight, we got SNOW!  Horray!  I love snow.  I like how pretty it makes the trees look, and how it lines the street.  It's all very..."White Christmas".  Even though Christmas is over I was happy for the snow.  I even don't mind shoveling snow.  Granted, I am happy that this year, living in an apartment, there is no need for me to shovel.

My apartment area isn't quite this pretty...but almost.


I'd also like to mention that my computer, being very old and beginning to show its age, has decided to disallow the use of my delete/backspace button.  This has made my typing of this post slightly more difficult to complete than usual.  I believe this is an attempt to show me that I should be getting a new MacBook Pro.  But my lack of funds allows me to fulfill this prophecy.  I need a new one.  Please?!  MacBook Pro Goddess- can you please send me a MacBook Pro somehow?  I'm only asking for a 13" one- minimal specifications.  Please?  

Sunday 25 December 2011

Christmas-time

We're busy out and about for Christmas but I was sent two funny items I thought were worthy of sharing. Enjoy!

http://yR9423APZ7uK.break.com/dnet/media/2011/12/22/c9077929-cf00-4528-afc2-e692fceefff5_1.mp4.

Friday 23 December 2011

Level: Prestige

In Modern Warfare 3 there are levels- as with most video games.  But there's a special little extra.  Something called- Prestige!  (ooooohhh, ahhhhhh)

Prestige is when you hit level 80 and get to the end of that level, in which you get a Prestige Token, which you get to spend at the Prestige Shop.  You also get Prestige Emblems- up to Prestige 10.  Can you honestly say you have ever had so much Prestige?!  Brandon can!   He's Prestiged (can you use that as a verb?) twice!

Thursday 22 December 2011

Domesticated? Awesome.

Domesticate [duh-mes-ti-keyt]
- verb (used with object)
1. to convert (animals, plants, etc.) to domestic uses; tame
2. to accustom to household life or affairs
3. to make more ordinary, familiar, acceptable or the like

A few weeks ago someone called me "domesticated", in regards to the baking  I do and home I decorate.  I responded with "thanks".  Then when I told Brandon the story, he asked me, "are you ok with that?"  And I thought about it and decided, yes I am ok with that.  In fact, I was excited to hear someone say that.  Is that wrong? 

Well, reading the above description I'd say perhaps domesticated by definition isn't exactly what I want to be.  Converted?  Domestic uses?  Tame?  What kind of words are these to describe a woman who enjoys taking care of a home, cooking, baking and having a family?  I think in the terms of discussing a woman who would typically be described as "domestic" we should come up with a new definition. Something which describes someone who has the strength, patience and enough witts to deal with the men (and sometimes children) in our lives!  I'll think of something...I just need some time.  For now, let's just chalk it up to ... awesome!


Wednesday 21 December 2011

Living with Me: Part 2

Following my previous post of why it may not be as easy to live with me as I'd like to think it is, Brandon so nicely pointed out that there were in fact many other reasons I may not be easy to live with.  I think this was just in an attempt to humble me- I mean, why else would he make these things up?

Super Coordinated/Organized: I like to organize everything in my life.  Is that a flaw?  I don't think so.  Perhaps I can see how it may be a tad disruptive if I were to organize HIS things.  But really I'm only organizing my portion of things...oh, and sometimes things that he is involved in too.  My closet is colour coordinated.  My DVDs are alphabetized.  My books are organized by genre and size.  The kitchen cupboards are organized by type of food and what packaging it comes in.  All my paperwork is within filing cabinets by type.  I organize.

Perfectionist:  I strive for perfection, and I have all my life.  I am aware this is not always a good thing, because honestly, things will never be perfect.  So really, I'm striving for the unachievable.  Which means I never attain what I want.  I also place these unrealistic expectations onto others.  This doesn't bode well for them.  If I ask Brandon to do something, there are some days that I may have anxiety because he isn't doing it the way I think know it should be done.  When I tell him this... well it doesn't go well.  I once saw a quote that says, "you can ask me to do something for you, or you can tell me how you want something done.  But you can't ask me to do both."  I try to keep this in mind.  I'm not very good at living by this rule though.

My vast array of beauty products: I use the term "beauty products" loosely- as they don't really make me beautiful... but, I tend to have a lot of these products.  Perfumes, makeups, hair care, skin care, contact lens care, hair accessories, jewellery, and all the rest of it.  These products take up the entire span of our double dresser, but really isn't this expected when you live with a girl?

I bake often:  This wasn't a complaint he made in so many words, but he complains of eating "right" (is there a right way to eat?!) and I know my baking does not contribute to that. Oops.  But it's delicious!  As a friend of mine pointed out, the concerns we have as a 1st world country are...interesting.

Impatient:  I lack patience.  When someone in an interview asks what my weakness is, I always say patience!  Because when I get an idea, I want it to begin NOW!  Not in a day, a week, month or year.  NOW.  I realize this isn't always easy to live with.

All this being said, Brandon is a lucky ducky for getting to live with such a super awesome person like me!  I think he'd agree... right Brandon?

Tuesday 20 December 2011

5 Years Ago Letter to Me

This morning I checked my email and had one that had been sent from a website: www.futureme.org and my first instinct was to delete it thinking it was junk mail.  But I read it and it was a letter from myself... 5 years ago.  Let me tell you how crazy it is to read a letter about what was happening 5 years ago.  A lot changes- and some stays the same.  It was fun to read- so I wrote another one to myself... 5 years from today.  Brandon thinks it stupid and of course made fun of me, but asked to read both the one from 5 years ago and the one I wrote today to myself 5 years from now.  Secretly I know he wants to write one to himself in the future.  This is what I imagine his letter would say:

"Dear Future Me,

I am so fantastic right now!  I'm so good looking, 24 years old and living a wonderful life.  Plus I have a stellar, super fantastic girlfriend!  Video games are awesome- I play everyday and get all the achievements.  I rock!  My model airplane collection is growing and I hope by the time I read this 5 years from now I've got my collection completed.  .... "

OK, so this is probably not what he'd say at all... but it's what I like to tease him he'd say.


Today I Learned...

... about shower etiquette.

I enjoy my shower.  Most days I ensure I have at least 30 minutes to shower.  I know, this is an astoundingly long amount of time to be in the shower, right?  But I race around nearly all day, and there's something about steaming hot water scalding my skin that I feel is relaxing.  That description to most would sound like a torture scene, but for me it's bliss.  So I often will stand there and enjoy the water beating down on me.

Brandon takes very concise showers.  About 7-12 minutes and he's already out.  How do you possibly get yourself clean, relaxed and whatnot in that short amount of time?  He rebuttals back that he's not sure why it could possibly take me 30 minutes to shower.  Alright, I can admit to that being a tad long.  Regardless, enjoyable.

The other day we showered together.  And this opened up a whole new world of showering I knew existed but had only ever heard of, and not experienced, prior to this.

The Brandon shower:
Drop clothes all over floor, toss towel on toilet.  Turn on water (wait for some warm water- and look at self in mirror)  Get into the shower and don't fully wrap shower curtain around the tub which allows some water to splash about- sometimes on the floor.  Get right down to business.  Scrub shampoo in hair- rinse.  Scrub conditioner in hair- rinse.  Thoroughly scrub body all over with loofa and body wash- rinse.  Blow nose into hands-rinse.

I even think he may have taken longer in the shower because I was in there.  He did wash my hair (don't you LOVE when someone else washes your hair and scrubs your head?!  I do!).  Our shower is small- so there was a lot of maneuvering back and forth to use the water (which was not scalding hot).  This meant a lot of times our bodies touching the cold tiles of the shower- eww.  After a few bum slaps and boob grabs Brandon was done and left the shower.  This was my time to turn the water temperature way up- WAY up!

The Shannon shower:
Stand under scalding water, enjoying the so hot it gives me goosebumps feeling.  Normally I would have washed my hair following a few minutes of standing.  But Brandon had already done this for me.  Notice the random hairs on the shower tiled wall- think about cleaning bathroom after shower.  Soap up loofa with sweet smelling body wash and scrub-often becoming distracted by some thought of what I need to do today or add something else onto my to-do list.  Grab conditioner from shelf and lather into my hair.  Stand away from shower head to ensure hair isn't getting wet, but angle my body towards the stream of water to ensure I don't get cold.  Hang around until 2-5 minutes of conditioner instructed time has elapsed- rinse.  Use face wash and probably body wash again.  Lather up legs with shaving gel- shave necessary areas.  Rinse body. 

Here's the part Brandon absolutely hates- I brush my teeth...in the shower.  I personally, don't think it's that weird.  I understand it's not the socially decided way or location of brushing your teeth.  But let's think about this logically.  You're in the shower and you have to brush your teeth when you get out.  Often you'll end up with toothpaste on your face from brushing too vigorously anyway- then you have to use a washcloth or something to wipe your face.  Do it my way- and you can just turn around and rinse your face.  I'd also like to clarify that it's not like I spit on my feet!  I spit towards the drain and the water washes it away.  I don't think it's that weird- I feel it saves me time and maybe in some backwards way- water too.  I am a eco-warrior after all!

Anywhoozle, point is- men and women shower very differently.  And I'm glad I'm a woman so I get long showers to enjoy the scalding water beating on my skin!

Monday 19 December 2011

Missing Him

Last night Brandon had to go back to our home town for a doctor's appointment schedule for today.  I disapprove of this decision.  This meant he got home from work, we chatted with our new potential roommate for a bit, I began making dinner and then he left.  At like 7:30pm!  I, assuming he'd hang around for a while before going back, felt uprooted.  Well not me, myself, but I felt like Brandon was uprooted from me. 

(Realizing this all sounds very petty and selfish- I don't care)

Anyhow, I spent all evening alone.  Well Hudson was here, but he isn't much of a conversationalist.  Although it was nice to get to watch whatever I wanted to watch on TV, and make the foods I wanted without any compromising, getting up to make the bed and realizing I just have to fold the one corner I moved to slide into the bed and tuck myself in- as opposed to all the covers being sideways and ruffled when we both sleep in the bed.... the rest of it sucked!  Even before Brandon and I lived together there were very few nights we didn't sleep in the same bed.  So this was like a blast from the past- and I'm truly not interested in going back to those times.  So, Brandon don't leave me alone overnight again...please!?

This dog looks lonely- I don't know him, and I'm not sitting out in the rain... but I was lonely.  I felt a dramatic photo would help convey that feeling to the readers.

Sunday 18 December 2011

ManCare

I was chatting to my brilliant friend and soon to be business partner, Cherie, about her son and his daycare routines.  And we couldn't help but think how superb an idea it would be to create a "mancare"- daycare for men.  I decided to further the idea in this blog post.

The scene: It will have to be some kind of large warehouse as we are dealing with grown men here, not small children.  In stature, I mean.  Of course they're all big kids no matter what the age.  This warehouse is going to have to be somewhere convenient so city folk, suburb dwellers and the country bumpkins alike can all bring their men in need of socialization and care.  Outdoor as well as indoor space will be well groomed and maintained.

Toys & Activities: Based on my experience with Brandon and his XBox, video games should be kept to a minimum.  Why?  Because it will force the men to actually socialize...not merely through mics.  Sports equipment, guy magazines and books and workout equipment will be there instead.  Each man will be required to spend a certain amount of time outdoors playing sports, caring for the grounds or participating in water sports.

Nutrition:  At mancare, we will take nutrition seriously and ensure that each child guy is provided with enough food for proper nutrition.  Snacks will be provided at regular intervals every day, including a nutritious lunch.  Of course, allergies will be taken into account and we will keep the centre peanut-free.

Supervision: Being that these are grown men and legal adults, we realize they will not require the supervision children need.  However, we also realize these men will definitely need womanly influence and guidance.  (Don't they all)  For every 10 men there will be one woman supervisor who will help facilitate activities and meals and of course influence the cleaning up process.

We are open to suggestions for locations, names for the business, snack and activity ideas and will begin accepting resumes for supervisor positions.  As we know these positions will be hard to fill, please keep in mind compensation will reflect the difficulty of the job.  We look forward to your input!

Let's be honest- this will NOT be likely

While THIS is much more likely!

Friday 16 December 2011

The Modern Warfare 3 Creatures

A few weeks ago Brandon asked me to help him type out some descriptions, I picked up his laptop ready to type (before I "broke" it).  He began narrating to me the different MW3 "creatures" that lurk in the game. 
His list included:

Corner trolls- they hang out in the corners and shoot you as you walk by
Stairwell salamanders- similar to a corner troll, these guys hang out in stairwells running up & down waiting for someone to come by
Prone snakes- crouching around on their bellies and shooting at passerbys
Pump-action lemur- jumping around with pump action shotguns
Auto monkey- running around with automatic guns shooting at anything they see
Quick scope kinkaju- aiming & firing simultaneously with their quick scopes, without much skill

They apparently make their presence well known in the ever popular Modern Warfare 3... these are usually the people Brandon's yelling at from the living room.

Sunday 11 December 2011

The Laundry Experiment

The other day I went home to my mother's to do some baking for Christmas. (Which hasn't made it past this week, by the way.)  Anytime we go home to our parents' we take our laundry so we don't have to pay to use the machines in our building (which tear apart clothes anyway).  So I come home following a day of baking, laundering and feasting and bring the bag of clothes into our room.  Where it has sat for days.  I am usually the one to put it away, but this time I decided I was going to wait to see how long it would take for Brandon to a) mention it, b) put it away or c) wonder where some of his clothes were.

I thought we were close the other day when he had to get a shirt out of the bag to wear and he mentioned that it was wrinkly...but no action was taken.  Then we were going out later on and he was looking for a specific shirt, which was in the bag, but nope just removed the shirt and left the bag.  The following night I dumped the bag of clothes into the laundry basket- hoping he'd notice the change of location and perhaps take some action.  But again this didn't happen.  So there sits the laundry, waiting to be noticed.  I imagine some sad song playing in the background of some sappy movie about the laundry who just wanted a home.  It's starting to get to me, so I assume I'll end up being the one to put it away.  Or maybe I'll put his stuff in a box somewhere and when he goes looking for it I'll tell him the laundry fairy took it?  That sounds like too much work.  I'll put it away.

Saturday 10 December 2011

The "Good Story" Response

I've got a story.  It may be a short one, and it could be a bit longer.  But I have a story to tell.  So I'm telling Brandon my story and I can tell he's not really listening because I'm getting responses like, "uh" or "yaya", IF I get anything at all.  Those comments usually come when he's looking to hurry me up because he doesn't want to listen to me but also doesn't want me to get upset that he's not listening.  Because you know he is a very busy man- has to get back to his XBox friends after all!  The blow off isn't any better.
As I finish up the story (and his body movements are headed in the opposite direction I'm in) he's completely tuning out.  Now his eyes may be looking elsewhere, I may get a hand gesture to "hurry up" and he may even be taking steps out the door.  Finally, once I've given up and stopped talking he responds "ya good story".  Unimpressed.

Friday 9 December 2011

The Laptop Fiasco

I was using Brandon's laptop the other day because my computer is really old and I need a new one but have no money... I was using Brandon's laptop.  Before I used it he asked me what I was going to use it for- I explained I wanted to look at some webpages and also update my blog.  And then I commented, "it's not like I'm going to give you a virus or something just hand it over!".

So I begin surfing and got distracted by a website he already had up about some old sanitorium in the US somewhere that had hauntings and ghost stories.  I read through that entire site for nearly an hour, then clicked over to Google and typed "Ontario ghost stories". At which point this error message popped up (something foreign to an Apple user!) that said something about a Google update.  I tell Brandon it's starting some update.  He brushes me off because he's, of course- you guessed it, playing Modern Warfare 3!  The computer restarts itself and I figure it's doing its update and will figure itself out.  Wrong.  It restarts and all these error messages come up- like 20 of them!  And I have no idea what they say.  Then his background is black, and it restarts again.  By this time Brandon's match is over and he looks at it and tells me I've broken his laptop.  I don't even know what I did?!

Anyway, the laptop needs to be fixed.  It appears to have gotten some kind of virus.  Which I HATE that I said, "it's not like I'm going to give you a virus or something just hand it over!" before I used it because I obviously totally jinxed it!  I navigated off one page and onto Google!  So of course for the rest of the night and into the next few days all I've heard is comments about me breaking his laptop.  I disagree with the terminology- I didn't BREAK his laptop and what happened to it sure wasn't on purpose, and I didn't even DO anything I shouldn't have.  But I was using it when it shit the bed...

Jokes Brandon likes to make since he accused me of breaking his laptop:
- when we were pestering each other and he was frustrating me: "do you want to break my nose, like you broke my laptop."
- "How come you can break my laptop but you have trouble braking in the car?"
- while Brandon was peeing with the door open, I was bugging him that I could see his "peepee", his response was "don't break that too!"
- while I was writing a blog post: "oh you have a laptop to use? must be nice no one broke yours"

Wrong Number!

Recently Brandon and I changed our phone numbers... we finally committed to Toronto phone numbers.  That takes a lot to do when you've had your number since you had a cell phone!  Anyway, just a few hours after changing my number I received a text from a number I didn't recognize.  The following is the conversation we had:

Random: Yo
Me: Who is this?
Random: Josh, why what does it say  (I'd like to point out his lack of punctuation)
Me: Josh- listen I don't know how to say it... I'm pregnant  (Why not have some fun, right?)
Random: Thats awfully unusual for a guy
Me: It's a Christmas miracle!!!
Random: who knocked u up
Me: Jesus
       Or maybe you
       I've narrowed it down to either one of you
Random: Did. I get the wrong number (I'm writing it exactly how he typed it! Pathetic)
Me: But we won't know until it's Born
       I capitalized Born because it could be Jesus' son
Random: Jesus doesn't exist and god too  (apparently I hit a nerve)
Me: Well this baby is real!  So you better get serious about fatherhood!
Random: Dude stfu (for those not into the texting lingo of all the cool kids that means shut the fuck up)
Me: That's no way for a father to speak!
        Well DNA test came back- it's Jesus' baby, we can move on.  Thanks for your time- I'll never forget you

Needless to say Josh stopped texting me and I never heard from him again.  I had fun though!

Wednesday 7 December 2011

The Loud, Angry Voice from the Living Room

I'll be getting ready for the day, maybe reading a book, surfing the Internet or perhaps writing a blog post and I'll hear a large and loud voice booming from the living room, "ARG! Stupid dumbass corner trolls!"  or some other obscenity!  Almost always he's yelling at some player on Modern Warfare 3 whom he doesn't agree with their actions.  Actually, it's ALWAYS at someone on MW3.  He's got all sorts of names and titles he calls these people who do certain things in the game he doesn't think is honest game play (more on that in another post).

This is also when he tends to practice his accents from different places.  Talking to his XBox friends or just harping on random players, I've heard a Boston, English, Australian, Russian and some indistinguishable accents.  Recently it's been the Boston accent because the other week he watched "The Town" and "The Departed" which take place in Boston- a town he loves.  So he repeats lines from the movies...over and over again.  Oh the power of XBox and all sorts of funny things it does.

Today I Learned

A new segment for this blog I'm creating is called, Today I Learned.  This segment could include any topic of things I learned about....well today.  Or whatever day it happens to be.

I'll begin with one about Brandon's video game, Skyrim.
Today I learned... that Brandon's character in Skyrim can save trees from death, nay, can bring trees back to life!

A little bit of back story: this tree which sits in the middle of the village was dead.  The saving of the tree involved many hours of weapon recovery, tapping of sap from another tree... you know, the usual tree saving practices!

Monday 5 December 2011

Living with Me

First I want to mention how adorable our dogs are.  I know, stop being so mushy and girly.  But really, who can say they have dogs that cuddle together like this:








Living with Me...and why it may not be easy either
  • I'm particular: I like things a certain way...the right way (my way).  The dishwasher should be loaded back to front, the bed should be made each day and a fold of the comforter at the top to class it up a bit, lights should be turned off, towels should hang a certain way (some towels are for decorative use only).  The list could go on (as cataloged on this blog).  I have an idea of what I like in my mind, and I need people, well Brandon, to cooperate to achieve this.  I am fully aware some of these things are too particular...but that's how I like it.
  • I have a to-do list: I'm busy.  I make a to-do list almost every day.  It's how I get things done.  And I get great satisfaction from crossing each item off it.  This means when I have it in my head that I must complete a,b and c today and you throw in d I may get a bit discombobulated.  I also may get a wee bit stressed, ok more than a wee bit, if I feel like a,b and c aren't going to get done.
  • I plan everything: it's in my nature to do so.  Besides having a wedding & event planning business I've always planned everything.  As I child I planned what I would be doing as an adult, I planned what my friends would be doing, I planned what I thought the Prime Minister should be doing. Point is- I plan everything.  Don't mess with my plan either.  Thankfully, Brandon is pretty good at following the plan.
  • I'm stubborn: No one likes to be wrong, and I'll admit that sometimes it's hard for me to admit I was wrong (even if I know it).  Beyond being stubborn about being right, I'm just generally stubborn whether its getting the entire to-do list done in a certain amount of hours or staring down the dog.
There may be other things that make living with me not incredibly easy... but I doubt it :)

Saturday 3 December 2011

PP

Well the video games didn't cease for long.  Brandon was back on his XBox playing Modern WarFare 3 with his buddies doing their online gaming matches.  As I return from bringing in the dogs from outside I hear him proclaim, "Don't touch my pee pee".  A tad shocked I asked him why he'd be saying this to his online gaming friends.  This is the time when he told me about a gun they use for MW3 called a PP.

I have no idea what PP stands for- it must stand for something (let's hope).  After he turned his mic back on he continued with things like, "I have a red dot on my PP" ('cause he has some designation on his gun) and "you shot at my PP".  That was my cue to head to the bedroom and watch some TV- and write this blog post.

Friday 2 December 2011

Just a Quickie...

Some new photos of the free range socks, traveling dish towels and of course clothes on the floor...

traveling dish towel on the dining chair- no dishes that I can see need drying there!

jeans- in their new spot, or at least Brandon thinks so... on the floor
dish towel- almost in the right spot!

not only are the socks laying on the bed, but they're 2 different colours!
 Here I thought I came across an anomaly, a dirty sock actually IN the laundry basket.  But then I realized how wrong I was, because a moment later I noticed the dirty track pants laying BEHIND the laundry basket.  Sigh.

Following laundry day, I had folded and put away all the drawer clothes but had left the hanging items for later in the day.  Brandon must have needed something from the "hanging" pile and decided to rifle through it all- and leave the remnants laying all over the bed.


This picture just makes me laugh because Brandon loves Subway!

Thursday 1 December 2011

Goodbye Skyrim!

Well the other day Brandon finally beat Skyrim.  The game he's been playing for hours and hours, day after day is finally over.  (Yippee!)  He got 49/50 "chievers" otherwise known as achievements to the normal world.  He became a Thane, part leader of a Brotherhood, of a Thieves Guild, a few colleges, a master enchanter among many other titles of great importance.

Goodbye to all the orks, elves, nords, lizard-people, dragons, humans born with dragon souls, cat-people...and goodbye to his Imperial wife (stupid bitch!).  Fun fact: in this game you are allowed inter-species and same sex marriages.
The sounds of dragons groaning & growling, giants grunting, horses whinnying, Scottish creatures' brogue and all the other sounds of Skyrim will no longer fill our home.  What a shame.

While looking up the names for these creatures I came across an interesting article which explains to men how to turn their current girlfriend into a "gamer girl".  Below is the brief summary of said article (http://www.craveonline.com/gaming/articles/168843-how-to-turn-your-girlfriend-into-a-gamer?utm_source=crowdignite.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=crowdignite.com):
  • Find a game with a good narrative
  • Keep her away from the Nintendo Wii
  • Get her hooked on the online/arcade games for your console
  • Don't play with her
I hate to say so, but I agree with all these points.  I am drawn in by good story lines that seem more like movies than pointless games that contain hours of play. 
I can't say I 100% agree with staying away from the Wii... I enjoy my Wii!  But I see that it isn't productive to making your girlfriend a true gamer, seeing as the Wii doesn't include any online components or gamer points, or achievements. 
The arcade games on the XBox are interesting.  I don't like that they are only demos and then you have to buy them.  I mean, I understand that from the business aspect of it, but it sucks as a user. 
And finally, it's true not to play with your gamer boyfriend.  He'll totally beat everything you do first, get ahead of you in the level and probably even end up killing you at some point.  This happened to me at my own game!  We played Lego Pirates of the Caribbean together on his XBox (after starting on my Wii and him wanting more gamer points) and he kept getting ahead of me, even though I knew all the level maps.  This is incredibly discouraging, so don't do it.

The Relentless Wrapper

Have you ever had something or someone who just was so relentless?  Was always hassling you to buy their product?  Or a dog who won't stop begging?  This is the granola bar wrappers in my house!  They relentlessly hang around...everywhere!

Allow me to list the places these wrappers hang out:
  • dining room table
  • living room table
  • bedroom book shelf
  • bedside tables
  • living room floor
  • front hall cupboard
  • in front of the TV
  • kitchen counters
  • microwave shelving unit
  • on the odd occasion bathroom counters
  • window sills
  • stove top
Clearly, these wrappers are not living, breathing, responsible humans...the person on the other end of these wrappers is of course my one and only- Brandon.  How is it these wrappers can make it onto every surface possible EXCEPT the place they are supposed to be- the garbage?!